What really happened

Hello welcome to the shocking horrors of The Lodge, Minnesota.
April 18th 2006?? "Now everybody welcome it's those boys you've been waiting to see, N-SYNC!!! But they couldn't make it we'll have to make do with carl's Five." "Hey I'm Carl and thats Larry, Stig, Lenny and Gogopopolous. Ready one two three FOUR. Jagagagagagagagagaga dododododooooo dooooodoooo way-o way-o dududududududud BAM. Thank you thank you, if you have any names for that song please send them to us." "How about stick that song in my ass." "Note to self: Kill everyone." "Its not a note to self if you say it too everyone." "SCREW YOU!!!" "Anyway heres N-Sync." "Hey guys we heard this fantastic song which we're gonna do a cover of. Okay Ready one two three FOUR. Jagagagagagagagagaga dododododooooo dooooodoooo way-o way-o dududududududud BAM." "It was never the same after Chris Kirkpatrick was mauled by a tiger."
Meanwhile in the dressing room. "Hey Stig I think we rocked there world." "Carl, you were throwing up in the toilet all throughout." "Yeah but I could hear it. Way-o way-o thats a classic." "It fits in well with our new album name 'DADADADADADADADADADA' but it's kinda dumb repeating random crap like doo da and fad." "Hey don't dis random crap." "I won't. hey look over there its Van halen." "Where?" (AWESOME AXE KILLING NOISES.) The TV cameras could not record all that blood well not since the frasier outtakes has there been so much gore.
Meanwhile back in The Lodge. "I rolled an 8." "How can you roll an 8, its a one sided die." " I stuck post it notes on it that had numbers on it." (knock knock.) "Hey what was that?" "It's that new Carls five album knock knock. Can you remember it goes knock knockknockknockknockknockknock knockknock knockknock knockknock knockknock knock." "No, I fed that to Steve." "What???!!! THESE WEREN'T NOODLES!!!!!!" "Nope I tricked you an-" "DIE YOU FREAKIN FREAK MEN FREAKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" "What?" "YOU HEARD ME." Again it couldn't produce that much blood oh if you didn't know try and find out who the killer is...... Stig.
DUDUDU.. peace out.
Jonny D...UDUDUDU